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Your Wedding Proposal: Was it everything you dreamed of?

When you think back on how your wedding proposal played out, was it the wedding proposal you always dreamed of? Was it a welcome surprise or did it not exactly play out as you had hoped it would have? I keep reading these stories of brides-to-be stressing out and publicly questioning if they are making a mistake because their proposal was not as well thought out as they think it should have been, or something went wrong and "maybe it's a sign....". I am here to tell you to STOP overthinking that stuff! Give your partner a break and quit focusing on everything having to be perfect. Stop looking for reasons that your marriage will fail before you even get there! Marriage isn't always easy. You don't need to make it harder from the beginning by picking every little thing apart. And please realize that you are asking for advice from total strangers on the internet who are also fully immersed in what I now refer to as "the crazy" that happens to most of us who take on the task of planning our own weddings on a budget.

When I was creating our wedding website, I struggled with sharing any information about the story of our proposal because it wasn't exactly what every woman dreams of - through NO fault of my extremely patient husband! Because I tend to be a bit... proactive (yes, we will use that word), I ended up with two marriage proposals spaced out within our 2-year engagement. We had only been dating about 3 months when we had already started talking about getting married and one day we happened to have some time before a movie started and decided to stop and "just look" at engagement rings. Was it probably impulsive? Yes. Was it a completely bad idea? No. Were there pre- movie cocktails involved? Probably....

Long story short, I fell in love with the most perfect engagement ring and we both decided that had to be the one right then and there. I also knew that even though this was my second marriage, my dad had to be properly asked for my hand in marriage by my soon to be fiance, so I did what any helpful woman would do. I called him up right then and there and put Pete on the spot to ask away. I believe my dad's exact words were "well good luck with that" and we were engaged! Thankfully, through several life experiences over the next few months we both realized that we had some growing and learning to do both individually and as a couple, so we took that time and used it very wisely and pushed our wedding out well past the typical 13-18 month engagement period of most couples.

As we started getting serious about planning the actual wedding about a year out I started feeling like I had cheated Pete out of what he had originally planned for his "perfect proposal" so of course, being the helpful (not at all pushy) fiance that I was, I encouraged him to plan a "do over". As the months crept by, I started to wonder if he was actually going to go through with a planned proposal. And then the crazy started taking over and I started thinking "maybe he doesn't really even want to marry me!" He did end up planning the sweetest and most perfect "do over" proposal with a romantic private dinner at our fanciest restaurant, complete with having the waitress sneak my new engagement ring into a champagne glass (because I managed to LOSE my original engagement ring, which is a sad, sad story for a different blog all about why you should always get insurance on your engagement ring!) From my own engagement story, I have learned two things. (well, 3 if you count the whole GET INSURANCE ON YOUR ENGAGEMENT RING thing)

  1. Regardless of how "perfect" your wedding proposal goes, it is part of YOUR perfect story and will always be a part of how you ended up where you are, so share it proudly and remember it fondly.

  2. Don't cause yourself unnecessary stress. Your partner will tell you if they have changed their mind about marrying you. No need to ask them about it repeatedly leading up to the wedding.


Here is some fun information about proposals and engagements :)

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The Day we got engaged and the most perfect engagement ring!


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